WWE superstar Charlotte Flair penned an essay for the Players Tribune that was released this week. Flair moves through various topics and discussed her character “Charlotte Flair” and how it differs from the real person, Ashley Fliehr. She also touches on the lead-up to WrestleMania including the in-ring segment with Tiffany Stratton that went off the rails where both took personal jabs at each other
Charlotte Flair … She’s the QUEEN!!! She’s the villain. She’s supremely confident, and she never gets rattled. She thrives on you booing her — thrives on you hating her. She’s blonde, 5’10”, athletic as hell. Wins constantly. A FOURTEEN-TIME world champ. I mean, she showed up to a WrestleMania one year in a robe with freaking peacock feathers on it. Literally who does that??
Oh and one other thing: She’s a bad f***ing bitch.
But I’m not her.
Not always, anyway. I know that a lot of people want me to be her. I know that sometimes even I want me to be her. But I’m not. When that camera turns off, I’m just Ashley Fliehr. And unlike Charlotte, Ashley is not always supremely confident. And sometimes she does get rattled.
And she doesn’t win constantly.
Actually….. I lose pretty often. I’ve spent a lot of my life losing. And if I’m being really real — I’ve spent a lot of my life feeling like a loser. I’ve lost at just about everything there is to lose at: I’ve flaked on promises. I’ve cut and run from challenges. I’ve quit on dreams. I’ve had my childhood home foreclosed on. I’ve alienated friends. I’ve disappointed family. I’ve given up on myself. I’ve lost people I love. And yeah, let’s just get it out of the way: I’ve gotten divorced three times.
And I know that none of that makes me unique…. and I know that nothing in a million years will make me “normal,” or relatable, or sympathetic.
But I’m still human.
And I think in those times when people have seen me appear rattled by the booing, those are just the times when I’ve felt like — at least for a moment — the boos aren’t for Charlotte. They’re for Ashley. They’re for me. They’re because of the way I look. Or because of the energy I’m giving off as a woman. Or because of real trauma I’ve gone through in real life. So when it got mentioned in Chicago that I have an “0–3 record at marriages” … yeah, it rocked me legit. I’m not too proud to tell you that. I don’t need everyone thinking I’m playing 5-D chess all of the time. My reaction to that line was as genuine as it gets. Because — and maybe this makes me naive — in my head?? Charlotte hasn’t been divorced. So I wasn’t expecting it to come up in that promo….. and then all of a sudden I had an entire arena cheering as I got mocked for something that was (and frankly still is) devastating to me.
Which isn’t the end of the world. I moved past it — I always do. But when I reflect on my time in WWE … honestly, that stuff hits me harder than any bump I’ve taken. Like, it’s tough enough to play a queen on your BEST day, you know?? On your worst day, it’s even tougher. And on those days when you’re feeling insecure, or anxious, or weak, or ugly, or — yes — heartbroken?
It’s almost impossible.
You can read her full article here.
